Going Home for Christmas

Well, it's hard to believe, but tomorrow morning we will be packing up the Escalade and heading south to my Mom and Dad's house in Florida for Christmas with the family. I'm really exciting about getting away for awhile-- and especially to be "going home."

My parents still live in the house that I grew up in (well from 5th grade on) and I have many wonderful memories of Christmases past and other wonderful family times there. Unfortunately, our whole family will not be gathering together this year. A horrible rift has split our family in two and for the fifth year we will not all be together. I will, as I have been coaching my parents to do, focus on those who are there and enjoy their company. However, I would be lying if I said I won't be sad at the same time. Sad that my other siblings and their families choose not to come-- and perhaps even sadder that "irreconcilable differences" exist that seem to prevent us from ever being together again as a "whole family." I pray that this year will be a year of healing for our family and that somehow God will use the spririt of this Christmas season to bring us back together.

As I've gotten older, I've learned to appreciate the real value of family. And I've also learned that "family" comes in many forms. In addition to my immediate and extended family, I have a family at work, a church family--- and now a blog family.

Happy Holidays, blog family. May God bless you richly during the Christmas season and may you feel the presence of His Son in your life more vividly than ever before.

This will probably be my last blog until the New Year-- so Happy New Year, too.

Father, thank you for the gift of family. Thank you for sending your son to dwell among us. Amen.

More Blessed to Give?

I had a long discussion with my Dad yesterday about some of my thoughts and internal conflicts regarding Christmas and what it has become. We talked about everything from personal greed to corporate greed to the economic impact of Christmas shopping. It was an interesting conversation with plenty of sparks on both sides.

I guess the real emphasis of our conversation, though, was about our own family and how we are currently choosing to celebrate the holiday-- in particular in terms of how we exchange gifts. We currently are all buying gifts for everyone in our family, which I happen to think is silly and a financial burden on everyone. There are five siblings in my family and together we have a total of 15 children. So, doing the math-- including my parents, my siblings and their spouses and all my nieces and nephews-- it's a grand total of 23 gifts! Even at a modest budget of only $20 per gift, that's nearly $500-- and at $50 per gift that over $1,000! AND that's only one side of anyone's family-- and doesn't include anyone's own individual family.

I argued with my Dad that it was silly for all of us to be putting this kind of pressure on ourselves and our families. I suggested that rather than incur debt or endure hardship, we re-think how we handle Christmas in our family and maybe adopt the common practice of drawing names or perhaps even go to a system of giving "family" gifts rather than individual gifts. My Dad counter-argued that neither my Mom nor my two older sisters would ever go for such an arrangement. I argued back-- "even though it's a financial hardship on them... you still think they wouldn't be willing to change?" (I should insert here... I know for a fact that it IS a true financial hardship on them and me, even though no one wants to admit it!)

This was my Dad's reply: "Well, maybe it's the fact that for them, it's more blessed to give than receive and they feel a blessing by giving-- especially when they are giving sacrificially."

Hmmm... that response did not set well with me.

First of all, who can REALLY give in the true spirit of that verse when they are stressed about their finances? And furthermore, I really don't think it's fair or accurate to apply that verse to Christmas gift exchanges-- I understand that verse in Acts to be about helping those who are weak and truly needy-- having a sacrificial/servant's heart and attitude about giving of our means. In my opinion, if we want to REALLY apply that scripture, we would COMPLETELY forego our gift exchange and instead give our gifts to a truly needy family.

Secondly, I would argue that it is very difficult to receive a gift from someone when you know their giving caused them a hardship. Did they have to do without? Did their children? Did they max out a credit card to give me this gift? I love my family, and I don't want any of them to do that for me... it's just absolutely senseless! It's a sacrifice that is not worth making!

Thirdly, I would argue that being a martyr and giving regardless of consequence is not good stewardship. Not that I'm perfect in that department either, but I just don't see the point in over-extending for the "honor" of giving Christmas gifts! It's a misplaced value in my mind.

And finally, I question whether in every case it really is more blessed to give than to receive. When God gave us the ultimate gift of His Son, our only response is to graciously accept His gift. We can not give back enough-- ever-- to deserve that gift or to make up for that indebtedness. Sometimes I think we try-- and we may even do so while quoting this verse.

I would just like to spend a relaxing week with my family and focus on the gift of each other's presence. My favorite gift at this year's family Christmas will be just being able to be together with my family-- laughing, pulling out old photos and videos, telling stories and creating memories. It's a gift that won't cost anything, yet will truly be priceless.

Father, thank you for your good and perfect gift of your Son. Help us all to be good stewards and to be more aware of those around us who are truly needy. Bless our family gathering-- and all the other gatherings around the globe. Amen.

Truly Thankful

This morning as I sat shivering in my car waiting for it to warm up before leaving for work, I started to complain about how cold my leather seats were and how unfair it was that my wife had "bun warmers" in both the front AND rear seats of her new car. Poor pitiful me!

As I looked down at my gloved hands, the thought hit me... I am so blessed and have so much to be thankful for. I have a car (with leather seats!), the gas tank is full, I have a job to go to, I have a warm coat and gloves. Then I thought of all the homeless and economically disadvantaged people in our community. My three minutes of cold leather seats juxtaposed to their cold night on the streets with no coat or gloves-- and probably no hope either.

I felt a little like the Grinch in that moment this morning. Who am I? And what have I become? Am I really this selfish and discontented? Do I really need bun warmers to be happy? Can't I make it from my warm house to my well-paying job without complaining?

I want to challenge each of you, as I am challenging myself, to find contentment in this season. We are such blessed people... we are ridiculously blessed with physical blessings, we have wonderful families who love us unconditionally, and we have a Father who has already given us EVERYTHING we truly need-- His Son, our Savior.

Father, thank you for my lesson in contentment and gratitude this morning. Bless the homeless and less fortunate people of our community. Motivate me to do more than I am currently doing to help them. Thank you for the gift of your Son Jesus. Amen.

Christmas Lists

I don't know how the rest of the world feels, but I'm against Christmas lists. "Put it on your list," or "What's on your list?" or "Make me a list."

I'm sorry, but the very thought of all that just bothers me. Don't get me wrong... I LOVE Christmas and my favorite part of the holiday is the gift giving... it's just this list-making business that bugs me.

"Make me a list"-- so I don't have to think about you and what you might want... or because I'm so busy I don't even know you well enough to know the desires of your heart! Or, because buying you a gift is a simple chore, just like grocery shopping or errand running.

"Put it on your list."-- I really loathe this one. I actually know people with lists that contain over 100 items. Give me a break! Aren't we setting up some false expectations here-- and not just for Christmas morning, I mean for life in general. What ever you want... just put it on your list. There, that's simple enough.

"What's on your list?"-- In other words, I'm too busy and otherwise preoccupied to actually think about you and find something that would be a token of my love for you. Or, I'm so insecure in my relationship with you, I want to be sure you really, really, like and WANT what I give you. Is this really what Christmas and giving is supposed to be about? Not to me!

This year, I'm gonna try and follow God's example... he knew me well enough to know exactly what I wanted and needed for my gift-- Christ the Lord!

Thank you Father for your good and perfect gift of Christ! Amen.

Winter Morning

This morning was quiet and crisp. There was no snow on the ground or even in the trees. But my breath hung in the air as a puff of smoke. Not cold enough for a big coat, but too cold for just a jacket-- frost covered my windshield. Gloves are my friend today.

The sunrise spreading over the horizon is beautiful. The river is still and looks chilly, but the hues of orange, pink and purple warm it as they reflect the sunrise. A couple of lost Canadian geese glide across the river like a pair of ice skaters. Are they lost or did they decide sitting outside my office window was their place to settle down?

My small space heater keeps my toes warm and toasty. As I adjust its settings I think of the people out there who don't have a way to stay warm this winter. My heart is sad and at the same time content and thankful. I will donate my old coats to the Salvation Army this year.

The smell of coffee coming down the hall snaps me back to work life. I will be happy and pleasant today. I'll do my best to be as warm as the sunrise and as peaceful as the geese.

Thank you Lord for the everyday beauty of my life. Thank you for the reminders of how truly good my life is. Amen.

Hair

Ok... to be honest, I never thought the topic of my hair was blog-worthy, but apparently it has become such.

I don't know if this is linked to turning 40 or just a lapse in scheduling... maybe you can decide for me. Here is how the story goes.

The last time I got my hair cut, my wife and kids were also there getting hair cuts as well-- so it was kind of a circus. In the flurry of activity, I neglected to make my next appointment-- which I always religiously do every three weeks. I've learned that if I don't, it can take five or more weeks to get "worked in" by my over-booked stylist.

So, this is how this saga all began... I forgot to book my next appointment and three weeks later, when I should have been getting my hair cut, I was instead begging for an appointment.

My stylists, bless her heart, did her best to work me in as soon as possible, which as it turns out was last night. During the five days leading up to that time, I had hair that was too long to quaff into its normal style-- spiky hair that sticks up. I guess you could say that it's become my trademark-- blonde, spiky hair.

So, I figure-- I'm a creative guy, surely I can improvise a different way to style my hair until my next appointment... it's only five days! I started by combing my hair forward and applying the same styling pomade. I thought it looked pretty cool, and my style consultants (aka: my two children) agreed. It was a two-thumbs-up new style for me. My wife however; just rolled her eyes and said "whatever!" I've always found that phrase so helpful. The next inspection point would take place at work. I got mixed reviews, but most people claimed they really liked it and thought it made me look younger. Hmmmm... did I mention I'm the boss and all these people report to me?

So, I wore my hair like this for the next two days; however, I was afraid to sport this new style at church. So for church, I improvised yet another style. My church doo was a much more conservative look... I basically parted my hair on the side and opted for the more conservative mouse as opposed to the more radical pomade product. Everyone at church noticed... don't know if they liked it or not, but they definitely noticed. Well, then we happened to have Praise Team practice that afternoon for an upcoming recital for one of our members. I should state here that this is a very close and verbal group. So, my hair and it current and potential state and style became the topic of discussion. Amazingly, everyone had an opinion on my hair and what I should and should not do with it. It was hilarious!

Then at work, I decided to sport the church-doo and see what people thought of the conservative me vs. the wild me. Again, everyone noticed. Some like it better, some thought the other was better, while still others thought I should quickly return to my original spiky style.

So last night, I confessed to my stylist that I had actually enjoyed all the hair attention... and that I had decided to go for a new style. So, I opted to go for a longer style that would allow me to wear my hair forward ("wild style") and also would be able to spike up, too.

So, I'm sure there will be some who like it and some who don't. Probably others who could care less. I know at least one of my coworkers who thinks regardless of style, I'm blessed at 40 to still have hair!

So, here I am... after almost 8 years of wearing the spiky trademark hair moving on to a new style. I think it was probably time.

Thank you Lord for my hair... and most importantly for knowing me so well that you even know how many hairs I have. And for loving me unconditionally, whether my hair is spiked, parted or combed forward. Amen.

Little Angels

Well, the children's musical, "Angel Alert: The Night that Heaven Came Down," was a smashing success last night! I was so proud of all the children-- they all came so far in such a short time. It was a very rewarding experience to see how the musical transformed so many of them from frightened and bashful kids into real performers! What a blessing to see and hear all those angels!

I was exceedingly proud of my own two children, who both had leads and solos in the musical. They both did an exceptional job! And all of my wife's design and decorating talents were on display in the staging and the program. It was a wonderful evening, full of blessing and worship.

Since this is a new church home for us, we did not know many of the children and families. The musical has given us an opportunity to get to them much better. The kids are all so sweet... and I love that they all know me by name now. There's something special about getting hugs and high-fives from all the little ones.

I'd be lying if I said that I'm not glad the musical is finally over-- because I am! But it has been a wonderful and extremely rewarding experience for me and my whole family.

Thank you God for the gift of music. Thank you for the gift of your Son, which gives us all something to sing about! Amen.

Hanging Stars

Last night we put the finishing touches on the set of our children's Christmas musical at church by hanging stars from the 40' ceiling. I sat out in the middle of the auditorium and supervised the painstaking process... I don't do ladders at that height. As I sat there, I had to pinch myself... was this really happening? A musical at church? A CHRISTMAS musical at church? Wow...

Having grown up in a traditional Church of Christ background this is my first ever Christmas musical-- and that is so very sad to me. I am so very thankful that God has led me and my family to this church and that I am able to use my talents to glorify God in this way. I can barely describe how awesome a feeling it is to be a part of this... and to watch both of my children have leading roles in the production. I am proud-- proud of their talents-- but more importantly, proud that they are being given the opportunity to glorify God with their talents. Unlike me, they will grow up being able to express their artistic and creative talents in a church setting. Praise God!

I'm deeply moved at my journey and where God has brought me. Hanging stars may not seem like a big deal to some people, but for me it was monumental-- a life-changing experience.

Father, help me to always use my talents to glorify you. Thank you for leading me to Northside. Thank you that my children are being raised in this positive and nurturing environment. Thank you for your Son and for sending Him to earth. Thank you for the Bethlehem star. Amen.

Pierced Heart

This morning I awoke to more snow on the ground. It was still and peaceful. I decided to sit down in the living room and look out the front windows at the winter wonderland that was created while I slept last night.

In front of me on the coffee table laid the family bible, opened and marked by a velvet ribbon and an ornate cross. For some reason the Word cried out to me. I walk past that table and Bible at least 10 times everyday, but for some reason this morning, it cried out to me-- Read me.

Since I felt such an urging to read the Bible, I thought there might be some significance to the passage that was marked. I picked up the Bible and noticed it was turned to I Corinthians, Chapter 3. I began reading. The family Bible is a modern version (I forget exactly which one) that is very easy to read and understand. I love reading out of it, because it always seems so fresh and relevant. This morning was certainly no exception.

I read this passage like I was reading it for the first time. And my heart was pierced. God's word was truly alive... it was penetrating my heart. It was exactly what I needed to hear-- not what I wanted to hear, but what I needed to hear.

I'm so utterly amazed at how God and His Spirit will work in our lives if we will only slow down long enough and clear the clutter out of our lives to hear.

Oh God, you have pierced my heart. You have my attention. Thank you for knowing me and loving me anyway. Thank you for your word and the comfort of your Spirit. Create in me a clean heart, O God. Amen.